Moles, Pills, Parenting, & More On 'Fake Doctors, Real Friends'


On this episode of Fake Doctors, Real Friends, Zach Braff and Donald Faison are back to it with their Scrubs rewatch, getting into season four, episode 21, “My Lips Are Sealed.” Zach complains about J.D. kissing Carla, saying “it just feels so unforgivable.” Donald says he also had an issue with it, “but what I didn’t have an issue with was you giving me the nickname ‘Turkey-Turkey-Turkey-Turkey Trust-Trust.’” They’re all busy with projects, and Zach shares a photo of himself in his new top-secret project that makes Donald say, “I have never in my life wanted to kill my best friend until now.” Plus, erectile dysfunction, Viagra for fun, Elliott’s mole-butt, and helicopter parenting with CaCee Cobb, as well as the reveal of a brand-new tune to welcome on guest callers.

When Zach says he was “so mad at J.D.” for kissing Carla, Donald consoles him by saying that Carla definitely instigated it – even his wife CaCee thought so. “She kept looking at me like, ‘Uh-uh, she did you dirty,’” he laughs, “like it actually happened to me, and not the character!” Zach understands that, though; he also tends to react to things as though they truly happened to Donald, especially betrayal: “Like, ‘I would never do that to Donald!’” he laughs. While they agree it “could have been a whole lot worse,” Zach is surprised that Turk would get over it that quickly. “Can we have someone on who f**ked his best friend’s wife?” Zach asks their producer, Joelle Monique. “What, are we Jerry Springer or something?” she protests, but it backfires: “Yes! I would love to be like, ‘You are the father,’” Donald laughs. 

When Zach was very young, he clearly remembers being put into restraints to get stitches, so he’s surprised that the boy in the episode is allowed to just sit during the procedure. They get into a conversation about parenting, and Donald says he’s something of a helicopter parent, hovering around his kids on the playground trying to make sure they don’t get hurt. CaCee joins for a quick parenting segment, telling them that she had a babysitter tell her to “find God” because she was so worried about her kids all the time. But she doesn’t think she’s unreasonable; she’ll tell her kids, “Listen. I had my insides pulled out and put on a table so you could come out of my stomach to protect this head of yours. Do you think I’m going to let you go out and f**k it up on a play gym?” Can’t say much fairer than that. Hear the entire hilarious conversation on this episode of Fake Doctors, Real Friends.

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